Thanksgiving Turkey Anyone? Aggressive Gobbler Terrorizes Nation’s Capital

Thanksgiving Turkey Anyone? Aggressive Gobbler Terrorizes Nation's Capital

Authorities Outsmarted By Turkey Terrorist – He Was On The Run

( – Washington, DC, has a reputation for its amazing walking trails and recreational activities. Unfortunately, it may not be safe to head out for a walk, jog, or stroll in the woods anytime soon. Apparently, a suspect is slashing people in the thighs and legs, and some victims have had to visit urgent care centers for severe wounds.

According to the DC Department of Energy & Environment, the perpetrator is a wild turkey stalking a local river trail. The suspect is slightly overweight, comes in around three and a half feet tall, has a blue neck and head, an extremely sharp beak, and talons that can rip flesh. So far, more than a dozen walkers and bikers have experienced the dangers of this angry beast.

The city has set up a multi-agency task force to catch the wild turkey before he causes any more problems. It’s especially worrisome for officials as people don’t obey signs warning them not to interact with the turkey. Officers have observed people approaching the bird to take a picture or entertain themselves.

Nearly a century ago, America’s favorite Thanksgiving bird almost went extinct. Now, there are about 7 million of them nationwide. Along with the population growth, people encounter more unhappy male turkeys as the animals try to establish their territories through violent dominance. Tangling with a turkey can result in punctures, bruises, and painful scratches.

But hey, since it’s Washington, DC, perhaps the turkey is just straw polling?

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